If you are depressed you don’t smile right? Don’t go out for food or go on holiday? You don’t get on with your life, have friendships or laugh so hard you worry about your post second child pelvic floor?
Depression is when you wake up sad, you cry all day. You weep, you lie on the sofa eating ice cream and watching films which make you weep a little more. Right?
Depression is not like the flu. You don’t suddenly get over it. You may have a good day, you may laugh freely and enjoy a slice of cake for just what it is ..a slice of cake. However the next five days may make you feel like you have lost your footing and slipped into an icy cold lake, you can’t catch your breath and it’s too cold to swim BUT feeling like this ..floundering and trying to keep breathing you still have your everyday life to battle through. You may have children that you have to feed, dress and support each day, you may have a job or a relative that you care for. On those days where it hits you so hard you honestly don’t know how you can make it through the next ten minutes without crying. You do. You may even smile.
Yet you are still depressed. It hasn’t suddenly gone away, you may have got used to the way you are feeling but it’s still there. It may always be there. And that alone is frightening.
Just because someone with depression says they are fine doesn’t mean they are better. They may be fine that day, they probably aren’t. It’s normally just that they don’t want to talk about it.
It’s easy to judge a person with depression, it’s much harder to be the person they need you to be.
Be supportive. Be there. Don’t question their illness. If they seem like they are having a good day be happy for them but still be there.
Depression is not knowing when you go to bed what the next day will be like. It’s scary and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.