I’m not the type of blogger who writes about things which are in the news. Well not really. Occasionally something will annoy me or frustrate me but really that’s not what my blog is about. Today however I read the stories about the Duke and Duchess and their luxury holiday and it made me think. It really made me think.
You see before we had Izzy we travelled a lot. 4-5 foreign holidays a year was the norm. Izzy was unexpected shall we say and we were certainly not at all prepared for being parents. I remember conversations before she was born where we would chat about how when she was six months old we would feel comfortable leaving her with our parents and going on holiday just us two again.
And our last pre baby holiday in Peniche 2011
Of course that was before she arrived and turned our world upside down. She’s now 2.5yrs old and so far we have left really overnight to go to London and now we have two. Chloe is exclusively breastfeeding so it will be a while before that changes I imagine.
That’s what happens. Becoming a parent changes you. It changes how you think. Even if before you have a baby you insist you won’t change..you will. Even if after giving birth you insist you haven’t change you have. It’s impossible not to.
You may think from reading this that I think William and Kate have done something wrong. But I don’t. Not really. Actually not at all.
I wish I could do it. I wish I could go away and spend uninterrupted quality time with my partner. Because that’s important it really is.
In fact that relationship must be looked after, fed and watered or like a plant it will wither and die.
So why can’t I do it? Well the Maldives is a little out of my price bracket to start with but a cheaper holiday would easily be doable.
We have excellent childcare options with either set of grandparents where I know my children would be well looked after and I would LOVE that amount of time with my man.
But I can’t. Not now at least, probably not for a long time. I worry. I worry that my child will be upset or hurt or ill and I will be thousands of miles away with no way of returning home in a hurry and the thought of one of my children needing me when I’m not around..not just for one day but for seven fills me with dread.
I don’t think holidaying without your children is wrong, in fact in some ways it sounds wonderful. If you can do it I’m envious and I will admit that. We all NEED time without our children, just being adults, just being a couple and it doesn’t mean that we love them any less. I think I have to accept its going to take me a while to be able to do it but I’m aiming for a weekend away .. maybe in the UK next year. Start small
I won’t holiday without my children. Not yet. That doesn’t make me a better mother than people who do. Just a different one.
Read this fabulous blog post by my lovely friend Sophie of Franglaise Mummy for a different view about her holiday without her little ones and how it helps her relationship. It may have made me slightly jealous.